Diary of my unplugged day

The garden at sunrise

"IF YOU CAN'T UNPLUG FROM YOUR TECHNOLOGY THEN THAT IS THE KINGDOM YOU SERVE" (see Unplug from Technology)


The rules:  No cell phone, television or internet from wake-up until 8:00 p.m.


My Unplugged Day:  At 4 am I woke up and checked my iPhone for an email from my friend who lives in Cairo.  I didn't consider this breaking the rules - I hadn't gotten out of bed yet and it was important.  Things had escalated there and I was anxious for news.  No email.  I turned off the phone and went back to sleep.

Downy woodpecker

I woke up the second time to the sound and aroma of the coffee brewing itself in the kitchen and then spent nearly two hours reading the newspapers with multiple cups of coffee.  There wasn’t much positive news about anything.  But it was very peaceful.  I watched a few birds on the feeder outside and saw one of the neighborhood hawks flying overhead, checking the bird feeder for snacking opportunities.  He flew on.

Son #1 and I departed mid-morning for an estate sale and a walk along the C&O Canal at Great Falls, Maryland.    At the park, it was stark and beautiful on the drive in.  Tall, straight trees were plastered with snow and it was very quiet.  We noticed and welcomed the recent road repairs and those still in progress and were pleased that there was no admission fee that day. 

Maryland snow family

The walk to the falls was treacherous with snow packed down to ice on the trail -  4” deep and not yet slushy enough to keep from being slippery.  The cloudy day, however, had turned sunny.

Great Falls

On the ride to the park, and continuing on our walk, we talked.  First about how it was freeing not to have the cell phones (my son forgot to bring his).  “Yeah it takes us back to the old days, like the 1960’s.” he said.  “Imagine, we would be riding in a really sweet car with fins and going to get a malt after the falls!”  We chuckled about time travel and I cherished the time as we talked and neither of us checked emails, took calls or worried about communicating the rest of the world.  We couldn’t remember a time in recent years when we were together without at least one cell phone.

Great Falls

We decided if we needed to call anyone we would be out of luck since you can’t find a pay phone anymore.  “Everyone has a cell phone now,” he stated, “and they are all busy talking on them but they don’t really communicate.”  We talked about how we talk to others by phone when we are with our friends or we communicate by text, giving useless updates, facebook status that nobody really cares about and tweets.  "All substitutes for real conversations like we’re having right now," I thought.  There is hope for the younger generation if they wise up like this one has.  Yup he’s a keeper.

Great Falls

Great Falls

C and O Canal National Visitors Center

It was quiet and very slippery at the falls.  I asked the keeper if he might want to go see “The King’s Speech” at the theatre later that evening.  “Not my kind of movie,” he replied.  “No explosions, car chases or boobs.”  I made one of those disapproving Mom noises, and tried to convince him it was a movie worth going to and got nowhere.  Perhaps I gave him too much credit for widsom earlier.

Old dog in the snow

Sampling of the downed limbs

After a stop for lunch and more conversation, we headed home.  There, we entertained the dog by throwing snowballs, then spent an hour moving several large limbs from the mighty pine trees that flank the garden.  The recent snow and ice were too much for some of the huge old limbs.  Son #2 agreed to take the limbs to the dump for recycling.  He's a keeper, too!

Williamsburg Husk teacup

Instead of checking email and wasting time on the internet, I enjoyed a pot of tea using a teacup from Mother’s china, purchased while she and Dad were on their honeymoon in Williamsburg.  Because I had the time, I simply sat and enjoyed my tea.  

After that, I listened to the radio and sorted through old family photographs, organizing them and puzzling over many without labels - I had no idea who was in them.  Labeling photographs is very helpful for future generations. 

bonsai

amaryllis

orchid bud

Jack the Jade

amaryllis bud

I watered my bonsai, Jack the Jade, and Sham the Shamrock.  I admired the beautiful bloom on the amaryllis and the buds that will soon be blooms on the orchid.

Sham the Shamrock

With paper and my favorite fountain pen, I outlined an article, enjoying the feel of the pen and the flow of the ink.  As much as I like the speed of writing on the laptop, I am really old fashioned about the power of the pen.  

After dinner the sons turned on a movie and I ignored it.  When 8:00 rolled around, I was a little disappointed because I felt I had an obligation to check email.  First email check was for news from Cairo; unfortunately there was none.  

It was a great day.  I didn't waste any time.   I relaxed between activities and spent much more time communicating in a very positive way.  I think this is going to become a habit.  Good things happen when you communicate in person.  

Try it.  Let me know how it goes for you.  I hope your day is as enjoyable as mine.

Fall at the US National Arboretum

Washington is alive with color and much of it is at the United States National Arboretum.  Today I attended a class on winterizing bonsai and had an opportunity to go behind the scenes (on the other side of those doors marked "STAFF ONLY") at the National Bonsai and Penjing Museum and enjoyed a walk around the grounds.

bald cypress (bonsai collection)

bonsai collection

My lesson for the day:   take advantage of opportunities to learn and you will be richly rewarded.  Not only was the class interesting, but I got there in record time, had a fantastic parking place (no small feat on a busy Saturday) and the fall colors were amazing --from the tiniest bonsai to the japanese maples and the groves of maples, oaks, sycamore and more.  What a gift, what a day!

A Good Day

Baltic sunset somewhere near Gdansk, Poland

Yesterday was not such a good day; I mixed up the times of two appointments.  My organizational skills are highly developed and it really throws me when such things happen.  Then, I was told by my current health care insurer that I had cancelled the policy and they planned to bill me for all my charges since March.  The benefits office of my former employer (the government) said they would FAX the insurance company a letter in a few days informing them that my coverage had never lapsed.


A few DAYS?  Who sends a FAX anymore?  Aren't our communications capabilities a little more evolved than that?   "Can't you send a PDF by email to a human NOW?" I asked.  The response was a definitive "we don't do that".  I got the feeling that the same request had been made and denied before.  This will be resolved, but it is unnerving and completely unnecessary.

Someone asked me yesterday what a good day was like for me, but being caught up in the crud of the day, I didn't have a very good answer.


I know that the Lord only gives us as much badness as we can handle.  My hands are definitely too big because they can apparently hold a lot and frankly I have been feeling that I would like to share some of what has been ending up in my paws.


Today was a good day.  What a difference.  Here is what it looked like:

My newest bonsai, a birthday gift from Debbie

One of my noisy gentleman bullfrogs

A GOOD DAY

• Watering my bonsais in the early morning under clear skies and cool temperatures in the low 70's with almost no humidity.
• Hearing my bullfrogs croaking and sitting on the log bench observing their antics.
• Fixing a yummy breakfast for my son and enjoying it with him.
• Heading out the door at 7:30 for a flea market and yard sales with the same son and finding great bargains and mostly enjoying each other's company (and also deciding that we should not do it more than once a month because we get on one another's nerves after a whole morning of driving around together; I do too much mothering and he is stubborn as an old mule ).
• Going to the gym and power walking on the treadmill for 5.5 miles and burning some 600 calories.
• Having my son install new brake pads on my SUV, saving me a few hundred dollars in labor.
• While driving to visit a friend, experiencing minimal traffic because everyone is on vacation this month, and blasting Beethoven's Ode to Joy and other favorites with the windows down and sunroof open.
• Welcoming a friend, enormous home-grown cucumber in hand, laughing hysterically at the snapshot and enjoying a brief visit.
• Having a brief conversation with an old friend who I will visit very soon, and realizing how much I am looking forward to the visit and seeing said friend and New England.
• Enjoying several hours of trip-planning time with my friend who I will be traveling with and who also fixed a lovely low-cal dinner for us.
• Rejoicing that I did not have to prepare dinner today (I have been doing a lot of cooking this summer).
• Driving home with more Beethoven and enjoying the cooler, low-humidity early evening air; watching Canadian geese fly over the highway and seeing the last reds of the sun settling in the West as I crossed the Potomac River.
• Drinking a glass of good port (ok maybe two) while listening to the night noises in the garden (including more lonely frogs croaking loudly).
• Thanking God I am alive, healthy, and have such blessings in my life including much to look forward to in the days and months ahead.

Creekside, Greenville, Tennessee

It was more than a good day; it was a very good day.  What does a good day look like to you?

Forever Changed

The other day in yoga class I looked in the mirror and instead of focusing on the bumps and curves I wish were not there, I looked myself in the eyes and realized I have changed, in ways I am just starting to realize.  That particular day I recognized how fortunate I am to be able to go to yoga at 10 am and how unlikely it is that I would have seriously tried a yoga class before this period of soul-searching.  And I liked what I saw behind my eyes.

Here are just a few of the ways I am different since I stopped working full time:

Helping Others:  Never have I felt so vulnerable, at the mercy of others and sometimes downright desperate for someone to give me a hand.  I have joined networking groups, made friends and expanded friendships with people who are also unemployed, and done my best to spend time with others who could help me in my search and lend a contact here and there.  My sympathy for the unemployed, the homeless, the downtrodden and the needy is at a higher level than it has ever been and I know that I will be a better friend and volunteer because of this experience.

Good Health Care:  My COBRA expires next month and I will lose my BlueCrossBlueShield Federal plan.  Recognizing this was happening, I have spent the first half of this year catching up on all the doctor visits and medical appointments while I still had choices.  I do not understand why legislation has not been enacted to allow employees to continue COBRA coverage beyond 18 months since the insured pays the full cost plus a premium. Starting next month I will be enrolled in an HMO that costs almost as much as my current plan but doesn't come close to its benefits; none of my current doctors are covered (many I have seen for more than 10 years). While I am glad that there is an affordable option, I am saddened that the cost is high and the benefits are inflexible and far fewer.  Health care is a privilege, not a right.  I now realize how fortunate I was to have had that great coverage.

Cost Per Hour:  I have taken on several consulting and part time hourly jobs during this period including a very short stint working for an estate sales company, a month as a Census worker, a few weeks as a special events consultant, provided administrative support for a conference, performed some brief government relations work, helped write a federal grant application, served on a review panel for federal grants, and a few other miscellaneous tasks.  Additionally, I have participated in paid surveys, clipped coupons, shopped at consignment stores, consigned some of my clothing, sold items on eBay and sold used books on Amazon.  I have also taken in boarders including international students and others assigned to the Washington, DC area temporarily.  In short, I have taken advantage of every opportunity I can think of to make a little money while waiting for full time employment.  

Getting an hourly wage makes you think differently about expenses.  3 hours of Census work would pay for the pressure cooker I recently purchased.  That is a lot of hard work for a pressure cooker.  I would have had to work for 10 hours at the Census to pay the grocery bill for last week.  Now when I shop, I look closely at every price.  I think I appreciate my purchases more, too.  I don't know if the pressure cooker was the smartest purchase I have made, but it is fun to have a new toy.  

Appreciating Living Things:  While I have always been a nature lover, this time has opened my eyes to many little things I had previously taken for granted such as spider webs with drops of morning dew, the sound of the cicadas, the fireworks of the lightening bugs, the late afternoon and early morning light in the garden, new life in the pond (the minnows had a slew of babies and the tiny black tadpoles have turned into tiny little timid frogs), the antics of my old dog, the annoying but really cute chipmunks that live in the garden, my amazing bullfrogs, and the night noises of the owls, coyotes and foxes.  When I was running around trying to multitask while working full time, I paid no attention to most of these things.

Slowing Down:  I take my time doing some things now and try to make them more enjoyable.   Ironing, cooking, washing dishes,  and even cleaning are tasks that formerly got in the way of other things, or I paid someone else to do.  As I have de-stressed, I have learned to make lemonade out of the lemony activities.   And if a project at home doesn't get finished in record time, it really doesn't matter. 

Yoga:  For years I have been told by various friends that I should take yoga.  Perhaps if someone had shouted the obvious at me, I might have done it sooner:  "You are one of the most inflexible people on earth and yoga will help you with your physical and mental flexibility problems."   After three months of yoga, I am mentally more flexible than I have ever been and physically I am getting better but that is more of a struggle.  I labor through many poses in the 90-minute hot class.  In one of the poses the teachers calls on us each to look like a "beautiful lotus blossom." I have never looked like that, nor will I.  But every day I get better.   And I will keep making time for yoga.

Volunteering:  I have done more volunteering during my extended time off than I have since I became a Mom (26 years ago).  Volunteering isn't optional for me anymore.  Hard working smart volunteers are needed by many organizations in so many capacities.   I have enjoyed doing different things with charitable groups and meeting new people.  There will always be a place for me somewhere and I plan to keep up with this new habit.

Sharing:  I just had the delightful experience of sharing my home with two teachers from Spain.  I'm not saying every day was wonderful; we all had good days and bad.  But I learned so much from them and I enjoyed sharing my home and learning more about a place I really want to visit.

Focusing on Positive things:  Yesterday I had a bad day.  But this week a number of nice things have happened to me and I am trying hard to focus on them.  Here is a sampling:

• When I was weeding the garden, a tiny baby tree frog hopped on my hand.  I like to think that it was one of those that I raised from tadpoles in the safety of a colander in the pond (to keep the fish from eating them).
• I lost a pearl earring and found it at the end of the day.
• I received two very sweet cards from friends who care about me.
• I received a gift of two female bullfrogs to put in the pond full of male frogs.  They are all quite happy and contented and there is a lot of noise out there in the evenings.
• A friend made a job connection for me today.  
• My guests from Spain took me out to dinner on Friday night and I took them to Great Falls Park, Maryland, and for a night drive through DC. 
• My serissa bonsai bloomed - tiny white flowers.  Beautiful. 

I am different now, in a more compassionate, relaxed and appreciative way.  Maybe those are the lessons I needed to learn before moving to the next job.  I'm ready.  Really ready.  But I'm cool about it and meanwhile I continue de-stressing and am open to more change experiences.